Lecture Series: Q+A From The Initiation
Podcast
Episode:
Lecture Series: Q+A From The Initiation
by Danielle Searancke
For today’s episode, I am sharing a Q+A session from the most recent cohort of The Initiation so that you can get a taste of the types of topics we cover! I will be running this signature program at least one more time, and the waitlist is available below. In addition to the foundations for your first 3 years of mediumship development, I also tailor the classes and Q+A sessions to the needs of the students in the cohort, making each round of the experience unique!
Before the episode, I shared a few Spirit School updates before I take my first break in 2023! There has been so much happening between the membership, running programs, planning the retreat, and building my physical school on the Squamish waterfront. I may be experiencing decision fatigue from the renovation, but there have been so many magical moments on this journey. I already have Sheila V, Dominic Bogue and Julie Poole scheduled to teach in the Spirit School space this year! I’ve also had money and connections appear effortlessly to provide solutions as I needed them. I’ve felt that my late mentor Mavis Pittilla has had a hand in making the Spirit School journey so magical!
Episode:
Lecture Series: Q+A From The Initiation
Spirit School Podcast
In this episode:
Some of my readings are intuitive, and some mediumship, and some both. I've had a lot of people ask how often they can book a session. I just said they could whenever they feel called to do so. But I'm not really sure if there's a rule of thumb for this. What do you suggest, Danielle?
Avoiding codependency and taking opportunities to mentor clients in their own gifts
Do you allow your sitters to record your readings? I know some mediums are very adamant about no recording, but this seems to be a popular request. What are the major concerns with this?
Accepting cringe moments and shadows, and challenging “standards” in mediumship
When did you really know that mediumship was for you, that this was something you wanted to do as a profession? Did you feel it like a calling or was it more like a slow burn?
Could you talk a little bit about knowing when you're ready to serve the public? I'm finding that I'm always thinking I'm just not good enough and I am kind of wondering if I'll get to the point where I do feel good enough.
I've heard many people say it's easier to read for those who actually have a need, but then I get worried that I won't meet their need. Any insight to this?
I find myself asking clarifying questions during my readings to ensure I'm interpreting and discerning information from the spirit accurately. Any tips on how to get away from doing this?
I find I do best when my sitter is more involved in the reading. For instance, when they ask questions, I receive the answers quickly. When we don't have a specific question or intention, I find the reading still works, but it's not as powerful. Any thoughts on this?
Can you speak about when we have a hard time connecting to a sitter and what that might indicate, and maybe how to maintain a connection when you feel you're not connecting fluidly?
As a reader, how do you manage more than one spirit coming through in a reading? I often feel overwhelmed.
Have you ever used a feedback form for your sitters while you're still practicing prior to professional?
The importance of reciprocity
Spirit School Links
The Initiation Summer 2023 Waitlist: https://view.flodesk.com/pages/63d3191cde520bd60dc33d63
The Initiation 2.0 Summer 2023 Waitlist: https://view.flodesk.com/pages/641a55f4dc3789176b6944ea
Spirit School Collective: https://www.squamishmedium.com/spiritschoolcollective
Join us on the FREE Spirit School platform: https://myspiritschoolcollective.com/plans/
Trauma Informed Lightworker Waitlist: https://view.flodesk.com/pages/6398f03888aca7e15696b1fa
Visit Spirit School at https://www.squamishmedium.com/ for all courses and upcoming programs
View full transcripts of podcast episodes at https://www.squamishmedium.com/blog
-
Lecture Series: Initiation Mediumship Q+A
Hello everyone and welcome back to Spirit School. This is a prerecorded intro because this episode is actually gonna be a Q and A from The Initiation latest round, the eighth round of The Initiation. We have almost a hundred people already on the wait list for the next time I run this signature program. Go look in the bio, or down in the show notes, if you want to get on the wait list for the next round of The Initiation. It could very well be my last round. I don't know. I thought this was gonna be my last round, to be honest with you, but again, since checking my wait list for the next round, there's almost a hundred people already on it. So I think that this is something that people still want, still need. And so I'm probably gonna do it one more time and then I'm going to be changing up the format of Spirit School starting September. But you don't need to know any of that right now.
So I will run The Initiation eight week Mediumship Foundations Experience. It's for people who are in their first three years of mediumship development from never connected before to, I'm making connections, but I want them to be stronger, longer, clearer. Even people who have professional practices already get a lot out of The Initiation as well, because it's not just the foundations course, but every class is always different. Every round is always different. The Q and As obviously are very different. So, what you're getting today is kind of a sense of the things that we talk about in Q and As it is slightly edited because we wanna make sure that we're not naming people who didn't give us permission to use their names. So there is some editing done throughout, but uh, yeah, that's gonna be it.
And so I just wanted to record a little bit of an intro leading into the episode to share some things that are going on and some things that are on my mind. And then I will hand it over to the Q and A. And so yeah, I'm recording this on March 24th, 2023. And after I hit publish on this and send it over to my assistant, I am off for 10 days. I'm gonna be offline, out of Spirit School, which is gonna be so weird for me. I know I've talked about this a lot in the past where I have taken Goddess Weeks because of my condition with PMDD, trying to find the best way to live with this condition that has no cure for, or has not a whole lot of research behind. Though I will say that it has simmered down quite a bit, so that could be with my age and just my own cycles changing as I enter my Crohn ages, and so it hasn't been as big of a deal as it was in years past.
But last year I was really good at taking a week off every single month to honor my personal cycles. And the truth is that when I came into this year, I completely forgot. By the time I started January, 2023, there was so much on the go. I had The Initiation 1.0 and the advanced mediumship the 2.0, which again, waitlist below if you're interested in expressing interest in me running that again this summer. But I was full on. And then of course, with Spirit School starting its build January 15th, all the negotiating that takes place with contractors, and lawyers, and landlords, and districts, and all the things that need to take place in order to open up a brick and mortar. And I just, it completely slipped my mind.
So before I knew it, I was running two programs and a membership, and building a school, and there was no time off to be had. And I was experimenting a little bit with different class times. So I was doing a couple things on Saturdays and I was doing a couple things on Wednesday evenings just to kind of see how I liked it, if it was something I wanted to consider continuing doing. And yeah, it just got really busy. And I ended up getting in full on work mode. So this is gonna be my first break. I'm really looking forward to it. It's gonna be ten full days.
It was busy getting this ready to go as well. You know, with Spirit School opening, it's a little bit behind schedule. It was supposed to originally open in March, mid-March, not open, but be accessible to me to use as an office. So originally it was gonna be open mid-March, but we had some delays with some permits, and then of course my vision kept changing and expanding and evolving. So once you're in there, things change a little bit and we still don't have a toilet but that's coming. It's coming. We have paint on the walls. It's going good. But it's going to officially open for me to use as an office first week of May. And then I'm gonna do a grand opening. And again, this is on the Squamish waterfront. It's so beautiful. It's the best location in Squamish. There's only two business that have this view, that have this location. It's mean Cordelia's Locket, which I'm really excited about partnering with them on a few things. And then I'm gonna have a grand opening, I don't even know, probably the week of May 20th. And then I'm gonna be using it as my office and it's gonna be available to rent for the community to use for workshops and different experiences that they wanna host.
I'm gonna have my first Spirit school reader come in and use my spare office, who's a local student, that I've been working with for a few years, which I'm really excited about. And then, we're hosting our first Spirit school event in June, June 10th and 11th. I'm having the very popular past podcast guest, Sheila V. You can go look up her two episodes I had her on for 2021. And she's such a powerhouse and she's coming from Australia to Squamish to co-host a two-day retreat style workshop with me in Spirit School's location. So that's gonna be the first event in Spirit School and I'm so excited. We've already had people register. We opened up registration, I think 48 hours ago we opened up registration and we already have people enrolled. It's gonna be absolutely incredible.
We priced it considering that people might be flying in, coming in, staying locally. So we kept the price really, really low considering it's a two full day retreat. It's only gonna be $695 Canadian with three payment options, which is really, really cheap for a retreat with two established mediums, established spiritual teachers. And so we're really excited for this launch. There's 35 spaces, so if you wanna snag up one of those spaces, come hang out in Squamish. There's Airbnbs, there's hotels if you're local, we've had a few local people sign up already. I think there's about 28 spots left. And that's gonna be June 10th and 11th.
And then I have Dominic. Bogue coming, who is my favorite mediumship mentor I've ever had, and I've studied with some incredible mediums. He's the best mentor I've ever had. He's coming to Squamish to co-teach a two-day mediumship development workshop retreat in person July 28th, 29th, 30th. He's going do a demonstration of mediumship as well. And then I have Julie Poole coming in September to teach at Spirit School from England. So I have somebody coming from Australia, from Scotland, and from England to come to Spirit School in June, August and September. So it's like things are happening really fast and things are really exciting. I'm trying to get my friend Rae out here to do an animal communication and pet communication something or other in July or August.
So, yeah, things are moving along and I'm really excited for the future of the space. I will still have all my online offerings as I always have. This is an expansion. And I will be sticking to doing larger kind of two-day, one-day workshop style retreats that I'll be co-teaching some and I'll be teaching some of my own in the space as well. But yeah, I'm really excited for the future. Things are coming along. For all of you who have been in a space of doing construction, my hat goes off to you. I have never had to make so many decisions in my life, and that has been very interesting, especially for someone who typically wears all black all day, every day. My biggest decision is what black shirt do I wanna wear today? What waterproof shoe should I put on today? And then yesterday they had me at Spirit School trying to pick out golds for the signage. And there was like 70 golds to pick from. And I'm like, oh my gosh. Like how do people make all these decisions? I just don't even know. So, it's been fun, but I definitely have been experiencing a little bit of decision fatigue. And then part of that has been just because I've been holding space for hundreds of people through my programs and my membership.
So it's been a very interesting season for me and I say all this because I know that there's so many of you who are listening who have been following my career, who have been following the journey of Spirit School for almost five years now. We've had a podcast, you know, this year's gonna be five years of the Spirit School podcast. And if you think about it, the Spirit School podcast turned into Spirit School online, which is now turning into Spirit School in person, and becoming like this hybrid. And it just blows my mind. It just baffles my mind.
And I've had some incredible divine experiences on this path. I have so many stories to share. I've had two most recent ones where, I was building the school and we got some notice from the district a couple weeks ago that the reason why my plumbing permit hasn't passed is because I need a second bathroom. Now it's only a 2000 square foot space. It can hold 40 people comfortably in workshop, but to have over 10 people, I needed to have a second bathroom. So, by that time we were ready to paint. The drywallers have already been in, the framers, like everything was up and ready to go, and all of a sudden we need to find space for a second bathroom.
So my contractor came with a ton of solutions. She's absolutely wonderful. And so, we had to make a decision and the cost was gonna be a certain amount of money. But you know, this project's already a little bit over budget. Things are like a little bit tight for sure. So it's not like we have all this extra money to throw at it. But I just leaned into trust and I just kind of said to myself, Danielle, like, it's been easy so far. What would make this be the thing that makes it not easy? Right? So I just kind of leaned into faith and trust and just decided, no, it's easy. It will come. It'll come together. So I let it go. Okay, we're having a second bathroom. I can see so many benefits to that. So, blessing in disguise for sure. And literally the next day, I go check the mail and the government had sent me a check for overpaying my taxes for the exact amount that the second bathroom was gonna cost. The exact amount. Like, I couldn't even believe it. I remember crying because I remember thinking like, wow, okay. I am definitely feeling supported.
And then I had another experience this week where I was looking on Airbnb for Dominic and Sheila and Julie to come out, and my assistant to come out, trying to find an Airbnb for them to come stay at. And I found this one. And of course, Airbnb doesn't give you addresses, but it was beautiful. It was two bedroom. I reached out to this person just to say, Hey, looking at renting this for people who are coming to visit me and just picking their brain and things kind of fell apart a little bit because through Airbnb it was hard to rent a space for my assistant, when it had all my ID on it. It was just like a little bit confusing. But somehow, some way, we ended up connecting and we ended up organizing a tea on Tuesday, and I was like, okay, I'll come to your house. I'll come check it out. So at least I can tell the people who I'm putting in here that I've seen it, that it's good, that you're normal, that you're safe. I went to her house and it was beautiful. And I kid you not, her place is about 50 steps from Spirit School's front door. It's incredible. It's incredible.
And then she says to me, at some point, we're having a really great conversation, and she's like, do you know what I do for a living? And I was like, no. She's like, I write grants for a living, and I write grants for Squamish entrepreneurs. And I want you to know that you're eligible for da, da da. And she started listing off all these grants. And she was like, I can get you $2,400 today for your wheelchair accessible bathroom. I'm like, what? So I literally met someone who was giving me opportunities, and she will help write them with me and get them for me, grants for Spirit School's expansion. Like I wasn't even looking for this. I was just literally leaning into trust and trusting that I'm following the inspirations, that things are unfolding with ease, and they have from the very beginning with this project, and that Sheila's workshop's gonna sell out, and Dominic's workshop's gonna sell out, and Julie's workshop's gonna sell out, and everything we do after that will as well. And it's just mind blowing. It's just absolutely mind blowing. It's the things that really make you feel supported by the world of spirit, and it's not lost on me, and I just feel so much that I have a spirit helper on the other side.
And I may have shared this story before, but I'm gonna share it here and then I'll let you guys get onto the Q and A. If you're interested in the workshops below, we'll tag Sheila's for now, if you wanna come check out the details of what we're doing together. Go check her out on Instagram if you haven't. She's so established. She's just so embodied. She's so integrated. She's an author. She's coming to Canada because she's getting hired to keynote speak at some major conferences through America and Canada. I'm happy that she's stopping by Spirit School to come hang out with like 40 of us to just like grow and develop. And it's gonna be psychic development, spirit guide connection, personal empowerment, like it's just going to be an insanely expansive time.
But going back to like a really early story, things were unfolding really easy with securing the space, considering it was unlisted and the most desirable space in Squamish, like a total hidden gem. And things were just coming so easily. And I kept thinking about Mavis Pittilla. I mentored under her in 2015, 2016, 2020 and 2021. You know, I wasn't one of her like more known students or anything like that, but I took her workshops, her retreats, and, you know, very plugged into her career. I would attend her philosophies. I loved that she did these two-hour inspired speaking events that I absolutely loved, and that was my favorite thing about Mavis was her spiritual philosophy. I never met a mediumship teacher or mentor that had such a beautiful reverence for the spirit world. And that's what I loved most about her and her teachings.
And I was sitting in front of the fire playing with Luna one day, and I just put a thought out there. I said, Mavis, I wonder if you see what your students are up to. I wonder if you help us in any way, because at that time I was starting to feel incredibly helped. And then all of a sudden I became overwhelmed with the sense of love. And I immediately grabbed my phone because a thought came into my mind, and a conversation I had with my daughter the night before. My daughter's nine years old and she was nine years old at this time too. And the night before, I was in bed, laying next to her. She was sleeping. She still sucks her thumb, and she was sucking her thumb and she took her thumb out of her mouth and she says, out of nowhere, we were in complete silence for like 10 minutes by this point, and she said, you know, mom, I know what happens in the seven levels of heaven. And I remember saying, what? Like, what do you mean the seven levels of heaven? And I was a little bit baffled because I don't talk about the afterlife very much and I feel like I have shared this story, but I'm gonna share it again. You know, you can go back through this podcast. I don't talk very much and I don't teach very much about what happens to the spirit world on the other side, because I haven't seen that much. Like in mediumship readings, I've had people show me who's greeted them, different things that they're interested in doing, but not a whole lot on the other side or the afterlife.
And when I was sitting there placing my thought to Mavis, seeing if she sees everything and I got emotional, I grabbed my phone because that conversation with KJ came to my memory. And I immediately grabbed my phone and I went to my Google Drive, because I know I saved Mavis's lectures. And the last lecture that I attended live of hers was titled The Seven Levels of the Afterworld. Woah. I mean, yeah. It just blew my mind. Just blew my mind friends. So, I do believe, and I think that that makes sense. You know, I think it makes sense that when we go home to the other side, the things that we're passionate about while we're here, we probably still have a passion for when we go home. So of course if we have it in us to help bring inspiration or further our cause or further our work, of course, we're gonna come near people who are still embodied, doing the work and inspiring and helping where we can. And so I do believe that we have teachers on the other side who are supporting us, and guiding us, and helping us along this path called life, which is a tricky, tricky life.
It's just been a beautiful experience from beginning to end. So I know that whatever happens with Spirit School, the location, will be beautiful and I know it will be easy, and I know it's gonna be filled with light, and it's gonna be filled with spirit. And in that, it just fills me up thinking that I can create a space like this that people can plug into and get a sense of their own spirituality, and their own connection to their divine selves, and their own connection to the spirit world. And yeah, I'm just feeling incredibly grateful. I'm incredibly grateful that I have an opportunity in my career to take 10 days offline and I have an amazing team that's gonna get this podcast up. And an amazing team who's gonna launch my Spirit Messages. And Andrea's even gonna do my Meme Mondays so that I don't have to miss a week, and I don't have to worry about it. And just feeling supported.
So I hope whatever you're doing out there as you're listening to this, that you're feeling supported and that you know that you are loved and supported, not only by the people who may not tell you around you, but the spirit world most definitely is proud of you and celebrating you. So keep living your biggest, baddest life, and I look forward to seeing you in Spirit School. Thank you for listening, and we'll see you next time. Here's the Q and A, friends.
Okay, let's get into the questions. I appreciate that. So, these were all amazing questions, so I will do my best to answer them from the landscape of today, just knowing I change and evolve over time, my philosophies and my beliefs change over time. So this is, you know, as of March 11th, 2023, how I felt compelled to respond to a lot of these questions.
Some of my readings are intuitive and some mediumship and some both. I've had a lot of people ask how often they can book a session. I just said they could whenever they feel called to do so, but I'm not really sure if there's a rule of thumb for this. What do you suggest, Danielle? So I'm gonna separate mediumship readings a little bit from psychic readings with this because when we're dealing with mediumship, there is a codependency that can be created because there may be a belief within a sitter that they need to be in the presence and in the energy of a medium to connect in with their loved ones. For this reason, I try to educate people with that in my private sittings, and I let people get one max, two mediumship readings a year. But I use my discernment. It's very nuanced. So I don't have a set policy around this because there it's very nuanced, like every case is gonna be incredibly different. And I really do lean into my discernment on how to handle it case by case.
So there have been families that have suffered, you know, pretty big tragedies that I will read for once a year. And then there are people who I've read for twice a year. But if there comes a time where I feel like there's this codependency and there's this lack of drive for them to understand the nature of the spirit world, and that they're bringing their loved one to me and that their loved one is with them, I may encourage a mentorship session instead. Or after a few private sittings, I could tell that they're very interested in it because they keep coming back and said, Hey, next time would you wanna do like a mentorship session so I can walk you through, you know how to connect in with them yourself, right? And try to empower them in that way.
Now with intuitive readings, it depends what tone you do. Like if you do, I'm just gonna use, Collette Baron Reed for like an example. She hires herself out to big corporations, like $10,000 a day, by the way. And that was like 10 years ago. So it's probably a lot more now. But she will actually be like an intuitive on hire with not very many parameters around it. I will do the visioning and the future fortune telling, et cetera, et cetera, of like what business decisions you have to make, et cetera. So in that kind of landscape, it makes sense that they would do quarterly or they would do it monthly even. I have a monthly healer on retainer that I meet with every single month.
So there is no hard and fast rule around this, but with my practice, I've always booked out pretty far. So people haven't been able to book in more than a couple times a year. But what you'll wanna look for is like tuning into your EQ, tuning into your own emotional intelligence, and you will get a sense if somebody is codependent on you. And you may want to lean more into that teacher slash mentor to help make sure that they know that they are made up of the exact same stuff, that they also have the ability and the capacity to tune into the spirit world. And this may be an opportunity for you to lean into that teacher and mentor role as well.
But there also have been cases where I have read for people every single year because they really do not have an interest in developing themselves. And then I also know that they're not going from reader to reader to reader. I'm the only reader that they have ever experienced. And so they just kind of like that one time connecting in with me and they don't really have that kind of desire to do what I do. They just like, can we just do a check-in like once a year? So that's how I run it. But again, you'll have to use your discernment with that. But there is no hard and fast rule. I have seen it out there though where, I don't have any super, super specific examples, but like where mediums may say, like, you to connect in with your loved one, you need to come back to me like every three months, you know? I hope that people are discerning around the intentionality behind having some sort of structure like that set up.
But what you really wanna look for is that kind of like codependency. That's what we want to avoid within this work. But for me it's nuanced case to case. I try to make these accommodations. And I will seek clarity too because I won't make any assumptions either, where it's just like I get the sense that you feel like you need to come to me and be in my energy to connect in with your loved one. Is that correct? Okay. Are you open to learning how to do this for yourself? I can show you even right now how you can connect in with them. So, hopefully that helps.
Hey Danielle, do you allow your sitters to record your readings? I know some mediums are very adamant about no recording, but this seems to be a popular request. What are the major concerns with this? So, interesting enough, I have never had a problem with people recording my readings. I actually encouraged it at the beginning. What was really hard for me was I used to record them and I would send them to people and then like literally five years later, they would be like, Hey, can I have a copy of that recording? I'm like, no, I don't have it still. Like I tried to say, you have 30 days to download this, and it's gone out of my sphere. I have been trying to encourage people to record themselves on their own devices for the tech part. And then even I just found out the setting, like, I mean like two weeks ago, how to have a Zoom session so that they can record it on their end so I don't have to deal with it at all, which is really nice.
Now, funny enough, I think it was Erica Jane, I can't remember the name of her podcast. I listened to it like a year ago. but I can't remember what it's called. But her name's Erica Jane, and I remember checking out her website and she had it listed, just as an example. So you can go look at it if you wanna see someone who has these parameters set up. I am by no means shitting on anyone or talking bad about any other reader. That is not my jam. But I did notice that on her website, she had some really strict conditions around getting a reading from her, like you weren't even allowed to be on speakerphone. You weren't allowed to even have a Bluetooth. There could be no one else in the room around, like you weren't allowed to take notes. You weren't allowed to take a recording. You had to have the phone to your ear. Now, does anyone talk like this still? I don't know. I haven't for a long time. I always have the headphones on.
So I started wondering about that. I started wondering about like why someone would have these type of restrictions and there would be a reason for it. They likely got burnt by somebody in the past and she is quite famous I think. So, you know, somebody may have used some of that content in the reading and publicly used it in a negative way as well. Now I'm a fully trauma informed business, so transparency is at the heart of everything trauma-informed. So I have published my readings completely unedited. I provide full verbatim transcripts for every podcast I record. If you go to my website, every single podcast is up there with full verbatim transcripts. I know the risk. I know that the risk of that is somebody could take portions of it without context and like put it out there. And that has been done to me, by the way, a few times, and it sucks, right? Especially in the hostile atmosphere of like accountability culture slash cancel culture. But I've come to terms with it in the sense where there's nothing I wouldn't be okay being accountable to, right? There's nothing I'm ashamed of. I do get cringe moments, do not get me wrong. I still have a lot of cringe in my life, but there's nothing that I wouldn't be willing to be accountable for.
So that's the reason why I think some people may not want to have their work out there. If they didn't have the kind of control over, you know, making sure that the proper context was there and that they are represented in a positive light, because that doesn't always happen. Who knows? Like what I think just intuitively may have happened, maybe somebody from the media like did a reading under the pretense that, they were an interested party and it was like all wrong and then maybe they ran like a negative article about it saying, I had a reading and it was completely off and wrong. Stuff like that does happen, believe it or not. So that's how come I think maybe some people may want that not recorded. But the thing is, this is an unregulated industry. There are no governing standards, unfortunately. I'm hoping Spirit School will be part of formalizing some standards within the space, which is what's happening in September with part of the changes that are coming in because, you know, I don't know what's out there.
And then I did check in with some people. I actually asked a few people who market and advertise themselves as like raising the standards. And I'm like, Hey, can you show me the list of the standards? Can you let me know the checklist that students are being measured up? Because I was doing some market research around it, and no one ever got back. And so I don't know if there is actually a list somewhere that people keep talking about these standards, and how these standards were created, and who was included in creating them? And was there diversity and inclusion with that process? Like those are the kind of things that I'm interested in as like an Indigenous woman and as somebody who you know, has been just hearing a lot of things in, in the spiritual space. So I'm interested in creating a list that is inclusive, that is representative of all walks of life and all levels of society, et cetera, et cetera.
Anyways, that was a digression as well. I do digress quite a bit and I'm sorry about that, but that's where that energy took me. So all in all, all that means is you get to decide for yourself what you're comfortable with and what you're not comfortable with. So absolutely do you on that. I have no problems with people doing my readings. And again, if somebody's upset about something and they're doing it to hurt, like I have pathways that are trauma-informed in this community. Even as you guys know, if there are complaints about me, if there are things that people think that I've caused harm, I have pathways that don't involve me, that it can get to me in case there's any kind of like repair that needs to be done. So I'm, I'm willing and able to be accountable to absolutely anything I've done and said in the past, good and bad. And that's just part of being a public figure.
Yeah, I have a lot of cringe moments. Even though I've done such deep healing, and I still continue to do deep healing about myself, about my inner world, about my outer world, I still have the same personality traits that I was born into. I don't think fundamentally we change that much. I think that our healing path just gives us the tools for resilience, and it gives us the tools to not let the energy of, you know, the shadow sides of our personality to take us down, and to keep us from living. So that's what I think the healing path is more or less. So I've always had cringe moments. I always kick myself like even that whole spiel about like the standards, because that's a big rant I've had for like the past year. I'm like, who's created these standards? Where are they? Where can we find the list? Are we chasing a ghost? Like I've been kind of challenging some of the things that are out there. Like I may cringe even talking about that today because I don't talk about that stuff too publicly.
And then, after the cringe, there was a meme I posted, my favorite meme of all time because it holds so much truth, and it was this Buddhist monk under a tree. And he said, once I accepted my cringe, I was totally free. And that is a thousand percent true. When I have those cringe moments, I come into acceptance with them. It is what it is. I can't change the past. Now what? Right. And then I move on and I allow myself to move on, and I don't hold myself to decisions that I've made in the past. I just continue to improve and evolve and grow, and move forward, and be forward focused, and take the lessons of the past, like with me, right? So the cringe still happens, but you just lean into acceptance with them and build your own tools of resilience to manage, to walk through them. That's my advice. And you're gonna be healing for the rest of your life.
Okay, when did you really know that mediumship was for you, that this was something you wanted to do as a profession? Did you feel it like a calling, or was it more like a slow burn? This is a great question, and my path is gonna be very different from anyone else's path. Just like your path is gonna be different than anyone else's path. I knew mediumship was for me, day one. Day one, no doubt, I declared to the world of spirit. I made a commitment. I am never leaving this path again. This path is gonna be my path for the rest of my life. But the truth is, I didn't actually feel called to do it professionally for over three years of developing. I actually was just, I was just having fun. It was a hobby for me. Of course it was a calling, but I don't think callings are always about, you know, how we make money. I just think that that is how society has this condition that we have to like, monetize every hobby or we have to monetize every single idea. And for me, it was just like a passion and a hobby. It was a lifestyle that I really enjoyed living as well. And I was happy to serve wherever I was able to serve, which was just basically in the development classes.
So I've always had a slow burn path, just so you know. My path has been very slow compared to, other people. What you see today is a product of 10 years. Like 2013 I started my development journey, but I have been aware of and have studied mediums and mediumship since I was 14 years old. And I saw Sylvia Brown for my first time, and then John Edwards, and Derek Acorah. So I've been on this path a very, very long time, but it was a very slow burn for me. And I remember Mavis Pittilla, she's just been so freaking close to me today. I remember meeting her for the first time in 2015, and I was two and a half years into my journey then. And by the time everyone else in our development circle had like websites up and they were charging, and I didn't feel the call to do that at all. And I said that to her. I said, I just don't feel the call to like make a business out of this. And she said, well, it'll call you one day if it's meant for you. Right?
And so it did end up happening, but what ended up happening is I am someone who, it may not look like it from the outside, but I will only make big moves after a long phase of discomfort. And until I get so uncomfortable that I have no choice to move, like I am one of those people, that Spirit will give all these little cookie crumbs to you and like I'll be curious about them, but I won't make any big moves. And then like finally like the rug gets swiped out under me. You have to move girl. Like we're gonna have to force you if you don't make these kind of conscious decisions yourself. So I'm the kind of person that spirit literally has to push off a cliff to like make moves, and that has been very much my journey. But what you wanna look for are opportunities that come your way. And that's how I eventually did start serving publicly, again with no intention.
But you also have to understand back then, I loved my career. I had no intentions, as I was working in First Nations healthcare. I was helping some of the biggest Indigenous change makers in Canada, around the world. It was an absolute dream job for me. And I was so respected there. They were actually priming me to be C level, like a COO. Eventually, like they wanted to pay for me to go get my master's degree. And I mean, I thought I was gonna like die there. I was like gonna stay there for the rest of my life. I really, really did. But as it grew, I realized I don't like working for big companies. I'm like, I'm not a corporate person. It was very grassroots when I joined. So I didn't feel a rush or pressure to lean into this work. But what ended up happening was I was gifted an opportunity.
My Shamanic teacher, um, Juliet Woods, of 3 Fold Balance. I did Shamanic studying with her for two years, and she's an incredible human being. And she asked me one day to come do readings at her Winter Solstice event and charge. And I was like, well, I've never really charged. I've been doing this for four years. You know, I've been practicing, but like, I don't know. She's like, well just come charge 20 bucks per session. And she listed all these different practitioners and I sold out all my readings, like before I even got there. And I did like eight back to back to back to back 20 minute readings. I made like, you know, like $200. I was like, what? Like what, $200? And I felt so good about it.
And then what happened after that was my emails were off the hook. Like basically everyone who got a reading from me at that Winter Solstice event wanted another reading. And that was the start of my career. It was by invitation. It wasn't even something that I intentionally came into. And then my life became around trying to find space to be able to do these readings. Because keep in mind at that time I had a, what did I have? I had a three month old son and a two and a half year old daughter. I mean, if you're a mom, especially if, like you can remember those young kid years, it was hard to fit it all in. It really, really was. But it ended up being a calling. And ever since then, I don't think too far ahead, to be honest with you. Like right now I'm thinking about September, and that's kind of rare. But I think that spirit needs me to start moving things in May and June around it. But like I don't see two years, three years in the future. I just follow like the next idea and the next inspiration, I follow it until it doesn't feel good anymore. And that's been the duration of my career. And I feel like I've been very spirit led the whole time.
So just look for those callings, look for those opportunities. Anytime I try to force something and make something happen, it really doesn't work for me. And then anytime I just get like this idea and I'm like, oh, I'll just follow this curiosity, things really work for me. And so you'll want to, you know, if you're interested in seeing if this is something for you, what I highly recommend is talking to your spirit team about it, letting them know your intentions around it. I would love to serve you in this capacity. I would love, you know, to X, X, X, X. Let them know that this part of your intention, and then just watch opportunities come your way. Right? And you don't know what those opportunities are going to look like or sound like. They're probably gonna be very different.
I feel like these things continue to happen for me because I continue to just like really follow through the intuitions without like dissecting them apart or trying to make them too logical, and just trusting my path, and just trusting where Spirit wants me to go. This path can be one of complete magic. And you do need that balance of practicality and like knowing how to do things. Like I know how to do a budget. I know how to make a business plan because I was in the corporate space for a long time. You do need to have a balance of that kind of like masculine and feminine, if you will. Right. That lean back and trust and surrender, and that lean forward where you effort and you plan and you create the structures that will help you thrive. So, it's a great path and it's one that's really, really magical. And if you have a desire to do it, it will come for you and just trust the divine timing of your life.
So whether we call that a calling or not, I don't know. I feel like in some ways it is, but I think it's something that we can set intention towards as well and not be completely laid back and apathetic, to the path moving forward.
Okay. I think this is along the same energy and line, but could you talk a little bit about knowing when you're ready to serve public? I really enjoy doing readings in a practice space and would like to one day serve the public with them, but I'm finding I'm always thinking, I'm just not good enough. And I am kind of wondering if I'll get to the point where I do feel good enough. I've heard many people say it's easier to read for those who actually have a need, and I feel that's true, but then I get worried. What if I don't meet their need? Any insight to this?
So I have a lot to say around this. Okay. For one, one day I was on TikTok, so I'm a bit of a storyteller. Hopefully you're okay with that. That's the only way I know how to teach is through experiences. I was on TikTok one day and I was in the bath and I was listening to John Edwards live. I think he's made his pivot to Facebook since TikTok is now kind of gonna be banned or something. I don't know what's happening, but I heard him say like, I'm gonna do one event, 30 of you who are catching this live, email this address. Let them know that you're on this live and I will meet 30 of you and you each get to ask me a question. And then I look online and I email the thing and they send it back. And it was like literally for my birthday. So I knew it was for me. I promise you this is going somewhere. John Edwards was the second medium I was ever exposed to in my life. So though he is not someone who, like I would model his mediumship, I respect him fully. I respect what he has brought into the space. I'm a huge, huge fan.
So I did end up getting a ticket to one of these question and answer events, and I was the second one to ask a question. And would you know what I asked him? I said, John, do you ever feel good enough? And what do you think he said? So I asked John, I said, my one question to you, my hero, my mentor, like the one who exposed it all to me. My one question I love that people were asking like, about themselves and I was like, John, do you ever feel good enough? And he said no. He said, no, never. He's like, and I worry for the person who really leans into that yes. And he started explaining how, he said in mediumship he's like, and especially to do this work publicly, you do need a little bit of ego. You need enough ego to be able to put you in front of those people and then that's it. You just need that much, that much ego, you know what I mean? And so hearing it from somebody who has been in the space for 40 years, I mean, he started doing readings when he's 14, you know? And for 40 years, he still doesn't believe that he's good enough sometimes. Guess what? I'm letting go of that hangup. I let go of that hangup, right?
Because then Spirit says to me, so good enough for who? Everyone? Do you really think in the human experience, you're gonna be good enough for everyone? Or can you trust that you're gonna be good enough for the people that we're gonna bring your way? Can you trust that the people that we'll bring you, you have everything that we need for you to help them with? Can you lean into trust around that? That's what this is really about. Right? So don't, don't chase ghosts. Don't chase illusions. That's why I talk about this like standard. It's like don't chase an illusion. If you feel like there's an illusion before you, it's meant to be looked at. And the beautiful thing looking at it, even if you were to ponder and contemplate good enough in this work, you know what would happen? You would be developing unique spiritual philosophy that will help everyone that you encounter. So I want you to ask questions like this, and I want you to ask questions of yourself like this. And I want you to contemplate them and ponder them. And you are gonna be building and expanding spiritual philosophy for the now, for the today. Right.
That's how come I don't like teaching other people's stuff too much because, you know, even Sylvia's books are very outdated for today's standard. You know what I mean? But they were super cutting edge back then, which is how come I mark the date and time. On this date, this is how I feel about these topics. And five years from now they're gonna sound very, very different. Right? And just like they sound very different today than they did five years ago as well. So good enough is an illusion, and I have podcasts on this. I have a whole podcast titled Good Enough. Go check it out. I share a lot of channeling and spirit philosophy around that as well. But the truth is we're gonna have readings that are easier than others. That's it. Just like at any other job, we're gonna have days where we're like totally in it and there's days where we're a little bit checked out.
We are human. Spirit knows this about us. They know that they are asking humans to do superhuman things, but we're still human. So we need to make space for our humanity, and that's how come in our invocation, we say the spiritual space deeply needs our humanity. So I think for a long time, spiritual teachers were trying to appear above the human experience, but we find that no one is above the human experience, right? Even Buddhist monks will say that they still have intrusive thoughts and they still have things that they have to work through and they've dedicated their whole lives to that. So you just need to lean into trust. And I need you to also just celebrate and understand, and this is how come things like the self-assessment tool so valuable, because when you can see your own magic, when you can see what you do well, and embrace that and celebrate it, and sit with it, and let the energy of that move through your body and take up more space than the fear, you're healing. Right. And that's how come it's like so, so important.
When you know you're ready to serve the public, honestly, that's gonna be a different answer for everyone. I think it's something that you're never gonna feel fully ready for. It's kind of like being a mom. We think we might be ready, but we're never fully ready. People talk about the lack of sleep, but you're never really fully ready for that sleep deprivation, and how you have to function through it, right? And so it's just like anything else. You're gonna have to step into the arena at some point, see how it feels, and continue to grow through it every single time.
There are still things in mediumship that scare the crap outta me, and there are still things that I can stretch myself a lot further to do, like traveling to demonstrate, or doing more demonstrations, or incorporating like group readings and stuff like that. Like there are still things in mediumship that freak me out, that are stretchy for me, that I'm gonna continue having to walk through as well. But there's nothing that will synthetically create this sense of readiness for you. You just have to hop in and you just have to see how it goes. And then that is literally the path. Do you think that it is something that you can do? You know, it's funny when I actually Googled good enough, it's actually a new phrase. It's something we made up. And that's the beautiful thing about linguistics and language, is that we get to put meaning to them. Right. So if we want to change the energy behind good enough, then we can phrase it in a different way. We can see it a different way. We can use it in our exchanges with one another a different way. I mean, look at what's been done with the energy of God, the word God. It's a bit mixed, isn't it, right now? So, and that's because the attention that we put behind, the words that we use it. So my hope for the spiritual space is that we will turn good enough on its head and start using it as a power source rather than something that kind of like freaks us out. And that's the power that we have as humans, is we get to choose how we use our language and what intention we put behind and what energy they carry out in the world. So something to consider around that as well.
Okay. I find myself asking clarifying questions during my readings to ensure I'm interpreting and discerning information from the Spirit accurately. Any tips on how to get away from doing this? Maybe it's better as confidence is gained? It will be, for sure. And then I asked her, are you asking for clarifications from spirit or asking for clarifications from the sitter? That's important for me to know as well. Clarifying questions for the sitter. For example, do you have a brother and sister?
So there are some school of thoughts, like if you were to train in a spiritualist church, for example, like within the church, no questions, like, absolutely no questions. Like they, like Mavis, bless her. I love her so much. Like I imagine she would whip me if she had a whip, but she'd be like, stop. Stop calling it energy. They're not standing there, are they? They don't have feet, do they? Like stop asking questions. So there is definitely teachers and trainers out there that they say no questions. I think that, again, when we lean into the linguistics and we lean into the energy and vibration of words, you have to pick a phrase that is keeping your power up, right? So sometimes we will maybe ask a question, and we're unsure, and we can feel the energy dip. Like do you have a brother and sister? Or I'm using Fleur as an example because she publishes some of her readings on her podcast, right? And so, she has a phrase where she says, you see this? That's her way of asking a question, by the way. It's just phrased differently. And it's a high vibration way of asking because it actually has the tonality, and the placement of it actually is uplifting in vibration.
So what you need to find is a way of seeking clarity and validation, because make no mistake, in mediumship, we need validation, right? We need that validation. You need to find a way to validate that keeps your energy up and doesn't drop it, right? So you might find like do you, might drop it and then you need to play around with the phrases. I say something like, you understand this? Does this make sense for you? And I can stay pretty neutral with that because make no mistake, we still need that validation. And I personally, in my readings, I've read for some people five times. And new information comes through every single time. I think that there is no scarcity to information that we could potentially pull. And so sometimes I think when we only allow sitters to say yes and no, we are leaning into that scarcity energy of there's only so much I could get. You can't give me anything. And I don't think that there's any scarcity when it comes to the spiritual space.
Now there is another school of thought around saying just yes and no, the feeding of the medium, et cetera, et cetera. But I wonder who that's for, you know? Like, is that helpful for the sitter? Is that like the best energy to serve in? Is that a healing energy? I don't know. I mean, maybe skeptics in the audience or people who are watching from the outside, like, I don't worry about those people. They don't see me. They don't see me at all. So it's like, I don't worry about that. I just wanna have healing, human to human interaction experience in my mediumship. So I do let people talk in my sessions, and I do let them share with me. And I do not operate from a sense of scarcity that they're gonna give it all away and I won't be able to pick up anything. I don't believe that. So in that sense, my school of thought is a little bit different. But again, there are no rules and regulations, so you get to choose your sittings, and the way they operate, and the way they flow that supports you as a reader, right? And I like engaging with people. And so I let people engage with me through that.
And I'm also very transparent, in the sense where if I read for somebody multiple times, I will say, I do remember this from before. I'm gonna see if new information comes through this, et cetera, et cetera. And so, you know, people can tell when you're authentic and integral. And if you operate from that place, energy doesn't lie. You know what I mean? Energy doesn't lie. So trust that too, right? So anyways, hopefully that helps. So yeah, find some phrase, and then also know that it's not a thousand percent your responsibility to interpret all the information that comes through. There is so much information that will only make sense to the sitter. So they can work a little too. And sometimes I will be in a sense where, maybe it's not coming through super, super clear and I will actually be transparent saying, look, I feel like I'm bouncing between two spirits and I can't like fully separate them at this time. So you might have to do a little bit more work in this next few minutes to figure out who it's coming from. And then over time, hopefully we'll be able to clear this out, right? So I can keep going. I bring them into that and I'm just being honest. And I'm just, just being of integrity, and there's no shame to that.
So hopefully that helps too, as like a little bit of a technique. But this is how come. I love studying other mediums. Go on YouTube, watch other mediums. I find that there's actually a lot more unedited examples from the past, if you go look up Doris Stokes, you know, Gordon Higginson. Go watch videos from like the early two thousands, like before Instagram came and everything had to be curated and perfect and edited to just sound right. Go look at unedited stuff from the past and you will see clearly how these like legendary mediums have handled nos and how they've presented information and how they've kind of like, you know, said, let me go back with this. And that's how come. I like studying mediums from that era, because it wasn't just about show and stuff like that too.
Because you know what else is annoying? So let me just say this. So say you don't do that and you don't check in. And then like you're giving all this information, and they're placing it. And then they're like, yeah, I know, I get it. I get it, I get it. And they understand. And then after the reading, they give you the recap and like, it's a completely different experience than you had. That would leave me with more questions than answers. So that's how come I like to like, engage and interact with people like as we're moving along as well.
Okay, so this is the last question, then I see some in the chat I will go back to, and I will move through these questions as well. I find I do best when my sitter is more involved in the reading. For instance, when they ask questions, I receive the answers quickly, but when we don't have a specific question or intention, I find the reading still works, but it's not as powerful. Any thoughts on this?
Well, one, not as powerful for you, or not as powerful for them, or overall, et cetera, et cetera? Like, be careful about which lens you're looking at it on. Maybe you don't feel as fulfilled in your readings with that. And again, you get to choose how you work. What you wanna be is a transparent medium. So maybe, just maybe, if this is how you wanna work at this phase and this season of your mediumship, all you need to do is say, in booking and reading with me, just know that spirit is present and I love to respond to my sitter's needs and questions. So come prepared with the name of a loved one you wanna connect with and come prepared with a few questions you wanna ask of the spirit world. So that they know in advance in booking with you that that is how you like to work. And guess what? In doing that, in being transparent, that that's how you choose to work, you're going to attract clients who want to work with you because that's how you work. Right.
This is how come we need to be okay not comparing ourselves and being different mediums because we will all be known for very different things. And because we are so nuanced as humans and there's 7 billion of us plus on this planet, and everyone can benefit from mediumship because we all lose somebody someday, we all need to be different. We all need to sound different. We all need to bring through information and deliver information in different ways. Or else, we're just gonna be all attracting the same kind of sitter. And I find that the type of reader, and I'm not saying this like in super conclusivity, I feel, but I feel that in certain styles of mediumship, where it's like just the yes, no, like just the evidence, I feel that that actually attracts other readers more than anything, you know what I mean? So I feel sometimes some of those limitations and restrictions are meant to kind of like, wow, other readers. It's almost like for other readers, and I don't necessarily want to just read for other readers.
So it's just about establishing how you like to work, and then being clear in how you make note of that on in the world so that whoever books with you does it in a very informed space, in a very informed way. And I still think evidence is king. I still think it needs to be first in every single session before we move into readings and handing down life, you know, advice, et cetera. But I think it's more valuable, even for me. Even if somebody books in with a psychic reading for me, I will say I still have to run it the same process as my mediumship. So I'm gonna connect in to either something you've done recently, something evidential I can connect into. Once I feel like I have established through evidence, my connection, I will move on to your questions and feeling into different areas of your life. And I'll feel more confident bringing through information that you could potentially use to change your life.
So I still run my psychic readings the exact same as my mediumship. The evidence first, and then the evidence message blend, and then I lean into the messages before I wrap things up. Yeah, and then just know that your way of doing a reading will change and evolve over time as well. So eventually you might enter a season where you don't want any feedback because you feel more confident, just like letting everything go in the flow and get things at the end. And that's perfectly fine as well. You just have to experiment with it. And if there is like an insecurity that comes up, or some doubt that comes up around this, in trauma-informed care, one of the best things that we can ask ourselves is whose shame is this, right? If you're afraid of judgment, whose judgment are you fearing at the moment? And does that impact it enough to make you change the way that you work or the way that you see yourself in your work? Because a lot of the things that we carry are not actually ours to carry, the judgments, the expectations, the standards, if you will. They're not even ours to carry. So that has been like a big wake up call for me too. Like, whose worry am I carrying this? Isn't my worry. And do I need to carry their worry this much, that it's gonna impact how I serve? Probably not. So hopefully that helps.
Okay, let me go to some of these questions. Can you speak to when we have a hard time connecting to a sitter, and what that might indicate? And maybe how to maintain a connection when you feel you're not connecting fluidly? So one thing that we need to accept is that we're not gonna be a reader for everybody. And we also need to accept that not every reading is gonna be a total knock out of the park. We also have to expect, accept that sometimes the readings that don't feel as good and warm and fuzzy to us feel perfectly amazing to the person who received it, right? So we have to come into some level of acceptance around multiple parts of this question. And I have given refunds. If there has been a client, like in last summer, there was a client, I have never had this before. I get covered in shivers and you thinking about it, cause I know it was divinely placed because Spirit said to me the week before, we need you to book in a bunch of readings to show you a few things.
So I booked in 10 readings last August, which was very rare because the demand for my teaching and mentoring has always outweighed the demand for my sessions, my readings. And I went through these 10 readings and the first one I showed up for, dead air around me. Like no movement of power, no movement of energy. And she was a referral from one of my students. And I felt so bad because I was like, oh my gosh, like this has never happened. Like I have given refunds when I felt like I couldn't connect or somebody wasn't landing before. But this is like totally new to me and they felt bad, like it was their energy. And I was like, da, da, da, da. I'm like, no, it's not your fault. Like, who knows? This work, there's nothing guaranteed, so I'm just gonna stop it here, give you your money back, wish you well. Everything was fine after that. So, it does happen.
And then there have been clients, like I had a client a couple years ago who, it was just like a struggle. Like I felt like everything was coming clear, but they just kept saying no. And I just used my emotional intelligence that I kind of had a feeling they were waiting to hear like one specific thing or a code word, and they weren't willing to open up their awareness to other possible spirit communicators. So I just made the conscious choice to say, you know what, like we've had multiple nos. We've spent 10 minutes. It's part of my policy. I'm just gonna end it here. I'm gonna refer you to one of my really good mediumship friends. And then they said to me, actually, they tried to read for me last month and they couldn't either. So then I was like, okay, it's not me. So I kind of have like a 10 minute rule. I'll know within 10 minutes if, you know, when we talk about, yesterday in class, we talked about light being our currency.
And if I'm encountering someone who treats me like a sideshow or is disrespectful to me in any way, I have no hesitation to stop the reading and give a refund. You just need to give one refund and that fear will be moved aside and it will end up being just something that happened. Every reader I know that has been doing this work for any given length of time has had to give a refund at some point. So if it's something that you think is going to take more light than fill you up, do not hesitate to close the session and do not hesitate to say, I'm just not your reader, and that's okay. And then accept it and move on. That's what I have had to do in the past, and there's no shame in it at all. You get to pick. And being of service doesn't mean we have to be service to everyone, right? And it doesn't mean that we have to be a doormat either.
I've had a lot of people, because I'm a kind person and I will bend over backwards to serve. I mean, that's just my cosmic makeup, that's my purpose in this life. I feel good and fulfilled when I do it. I don't feel like it's something that completely drains me or I'm doing it for the wrong intention or wrong reasons. But because of that energy, I have a lot of people also trying to take advantage of me, and suck the life force out of me, and suck everything out of me. And I can see them from very far away too. So there actually have been students, and mentees that I've had to break up with as well. And then just accept that I'm not gonna be for everyone and everyone is absolutely not gonna be for me too. And that's the nature of this work, and that's the nature of the human experience as well.
Okay. As a reader, how do you manage more than one spirit coming through in a reading? I often feel overwhelmed. Yes. So, there is a lesson under the evidence and messages week, I think, or the week before. I have to look, but there is a multiple spirit communicator lesson in there, but it is from two years ago, so I will talk about it now from today's lens as well. There is a reason spirit never comes alone. When we're able to sense multiple spirit communicators, there's a divine reason for that. And that divine reason will be very nuanced in different settings.
In demonstrations, I have seen multiple spirits come through because they have everything in common that they will be able to pass along messages to more than one person at a time. So in a demonstration, you'll have two people who will understand absolutely everything. Right? And you can't separate them, but guess what? You don't have to, you don't have to try to make sense of it. Just say, I trust that what comes through next as far as like the messages, since you're both able to validate all the evidence, you both need to hear, and not only both of you need to hear and benefit from, but many of you in the audience will.
They've also come through, there have been a phase and a season in my mediumship development, which was actually only two years ago, where I couldn't separate them. And that was really annoying. But one of the lessons around that, that I really got was how to really sink into my sittings and not let those nerves overpower me or stay with me the whole reading. Having that continuously come through taught me how to get my own sense of resilience mid-session without giving up, and that was seven years in. And so they were coming through for that reason, to help me in my continual growth as well. Right.
And then another thing that I do, if you are someone who like, I just need to separate you, I remember during that season having a reading where I had a male sitter in front of me and he was just interested in the facts. He was a practice sitter. My mentor picked him specifically because he was only interested in the facts and he didn't care about charm or charisma. He like total hot seat reading for me. Right. And I remember having two dads come through, which was really confusing for me too. And he could say yes to everything. Same name, same personality, same everything. And my job was to separate them and I said to the world of spirit, I said, okay, enough. The next thing that comes through has to separate you two, has to. And this was after five minutes of suffering in the embarrassment of what was going down and learning how to manage my energy in that sitting. And then all of a sudden I saw a Navy ship and I said, I know one of them was in the Navy. He said, yes. And then I was able to separate them, but it was like a little bit of suffering from that.
Another technique I do is I have them literally have one stand on one side, one stand on the other, and I will feel where the information is coming through. And I can separate them and choose to either work with one at a time or both. And then I will tell my sitter what's going on. I'll be like, I have them both here. I'm receiving a bit from each end. I'll try my best to be as clear as possible where it's coming from to validate things for you, but just know that they're insisting on coming through together.
Another technique that I have is a spotlight, which really works if you have an active imagination or clairvoyance, objective clairvoyance. And I have used this before and it's worked really well, where I'll put a spotlight behind me and I'll say, can one of you stand in that spotlight so I can work with one of you? So that's a billion things to try. And again, it's gonna be nuanced, different settings. If you get one technique, it's not gonna be applicable to every single sitting in every single atmosphere. So that's how come it's worth experimenting. And then you have a whole bunch of tools that you can try, but just trust your spirit. Just trust your higher self guiding you in that session as well, that you will call upon the technique that will be the most helpful in the moment. And that's how come it's valuable, and how come Spirit School teaches the way it does, whole bunch of different techniques so that you can call upon different ones at different times and just trust your spirit to call through the technique that will support you most in the moment.
Have you ever used a feedback form for your sitters while you're still practicing prior to professional? Absolutely. So what we wanna do is have a clear pathway and have a clear process for our sitters who sit for us and letting them know the exchange of this free reading is your feedback. And you have to get very clear on what feedback is important for you and include that in the form. Now, keep in mind, even if it goes amazing, not everyone's going to leave feedback in a review because some people just aren't as reciprocal. That's one thing that drives me nuts. Like one of my core values is reciprocity. And I have let go of every friendship, every acquaintanceship, every relationship that does not also have reciprocity as a core value because there are a lot of people out there, a lot, that just take, take, take, take, take, take, take. And for years I tried to appease the people who were just take, take, take, take, take, take. And I let it all go. So just know that you will encounter some people who will not give you feedback, even if they love the session. So do not base the quality or the impact that you're making in your work just based off of that feedback, because it's only gonna be the people who really see the value in reciprocity and that generosity of sharing.
When I see you guys sharing and making comments, I will say thank you for your generosity of this comment and of this feedback, because that is very generous and not everyone does it. A lot of people just want to just, I'm just gonna take what I need and that's it. I'm not gonna contribute to the space, or I'm not gonna contribute to the conversation or the expansion of peers. And there's no judgment around that too, because people may not have capacity to give more. They may only have capacity based off all the other things that they have going on in their life. So it's not even ill intended in any way either. You know what I mean? That's how come, for me as a teacher and a mentor, seeing you guys comment and engage is actually like a fuel for me, because it feels very reciprocal. Right.
And so that's something I'm having to kind of like, come into terms with myself around that. What do I need? How can I express my needs? How can I let people know what I need so that I'm not sitting in any kind of energy of resentment or unmet needs. Right? And that's been the hardest thing for me because I never had anyone ask me how I'm doing. I said to my daughter yesterday, I said, Katie Dean, you are nine years old. The first thing I ask you every day, what was the best thing that happened to you today? And then I'll ask her, the second question is, who made you laugh today? What did you laugh about? But never once has she asked me how my day was. Right?
So I'm even trying to instill in my children that law of reciprocity, which is how come I think that the world is shit right now too, by the way. Like Earth, mother Earth, this is how come, I won't go into that. I won't go into my social justice spins. But like if everyone saw the value of law of reciprocity, I don't think we'd just extract from other people and we wouldn't just extract from Mother Earth. And I don't think that we would like be extracting and extracting and not giving back in any way. You know, this is how come I grow tobacco, by the way. The traditional teaching of tobacco is like anytime I take anything from Mother Earth, I give back by sprinkling tobacco into it. Right? And so tobacco is a really good tool of reciprocity when it comes to Mother Earth.
And so I'm always looking at ways of bringing that more into the space. So you may even want to include that on your feedback form, saying, in the law of reciprocity, I thank you for providing me with the following feedback so that I can continue to grow and expand as a light worker and as a servant of the world of spirit. And like remind them of that law of reciprocity and start normalizing that, because I think not enough of us talk about it, or demand it, or are expressive about what we need to feel fulfilled. And then a lot of us are just kind of like walking around with unmet needs and resentment, right? And that's been one of my big human lessons, by the way too, even in my marriage. My God, I think it's only been in the past year I have told my husband, I need help. But I'm still having to learn how to ask so that I have the law for reciprocity in my everyday life, not just in my sessions and in my readings.
I hope that even if you didn't get to ask a question, that you got to know things that you didn't even know that you needed to know. So have a wonderful day, my friends. bye. You're welcome.