Lecture Series: Personal Power & Manifesting Your Dream Life from IGTV
Podcast
Episode:
Lecture Series: Personal Power & Manifesting Your Dream Life from IGTV
by Danielle Searancke
Because I’ve been sick for the past few weeks, while also manifesting my dream physical space for Spirit School, it seemed like a good time to revisit a past episode. This episode is from March and it’s a compilation of a few IGTV live videos about manifesting your dream life and cultivating personal power.
In this episode, I share how I called in my dream weekly schedule as an entrepreneur by allowing myself to dream big. I share about the shift from staying small to expanding so that I can inspire others by shining brightly. Have a journal handy to follow along with my exercise to manifest your dream week!
Join us next week for a 5-day experience, The Confident Lightworker, in the free Spirit School Community. I’ll be going live for 30 minutes each day to share teachings and tips about building up your confidence, whether you are doing this work to serve or for yourself!
Episode:
Lecture Series: Personal Power & Your Dream Life from IGTV
Spirit School Podcast
Some of the main points from the episode are:
My love for the creativity of entrepreneurship
Women pursuing their dreams despite limiting beliefs
Being clear and specific with our words when manifesting
The uncertainty when you take the leap as an entrepreneur
Speak from the heart and show up authentically
Realizing your power inspires others so there is no need to dim your light
Doing what scares you offers invaluable growth
Having boundaries around your cycles and time
How to manifest your dream week
Manifesting from feelings and emotions
Devotion and following your intuition leads to downloads
Learning how to find balance in your routines to optimize your own energy
Cultivating self love and personal power without external validation
I love my Instagram audience and our live conversations! If you want to get in on the conversation next time, follow me @squamishmedium on Instagram.
Spirit School Links
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Join the Spirit School Collective: https://www.squamishmedium.com/spiritschoolcollective
Visit Spirit School at https://www.squamishmedium.com/ for all courses and upcoming programs
View full transcripts of podcast episodes at https://www.squamishmedium.com/blog
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Hello everyone and welcome back to Spirit School. What I wanted to share today as part of the podcast episode is I often feel like though I love the podcast and I do offer as much as I humanly can through this podcast as far as knowledge and experiences that I've had, in hopes that you'll feel normal on your spiritual development journey and your mediumship development journey.
But I often feel that my best work is in my programs, in my one-on-one mentorship calls. There's just something about being in the energy with other people and teaching people live that just brings out like the most wisdom, the most confidence. The most inspiration through me.
It's edited because I wanna be sure to honor everybody's privacy, but I hope you enjoy this conversation today.
You guys probably know, especially those who are on my newsletter or follow me for any kind of like length of time, like I love entrepreneurship. There is nothing more creative I have ever done in my life than be an entrepreneur. Like I absolutely love it. It is something that completely drives my passion. Like I could have been a reader that would just do readings and you know, have a very long wait list. I could totally get by financially and live a really good life just doing readings. But there's something about the creativity behind pursuing an idea and formulating an inspiration into something that, you know is of service, but also helps other people, that just like feeds my soul. I just love the creativity.
I just get so excited when I hear a story about a woman getting an idea and doing the thing. And I know that my first, almost 30 years of life, I had all these ideas that I never pursued. I was just so scared. Many different things. Like everything that could have gone wrong, not even considering what could have gone right. And so I'm just obsessed with listening to stories about women who overcome those fears, overcome those doubts, and just like pursue the thing that they're inspired to do. There's so many limiting beliefs that women carry, more so than men, because of society standards and all this kind of stuff. And so whatever I can do to help other women kind of step into their dreams, like I'm all over that.
Who doesn't love a good story about somebody chasing their dream and actualizing it? Right. I meet with a lot of women who really don't even know how to dream yet. What are you passionate about? I don't know. You know how many women say that? And it doesn't mean that they can't find their passions. They do and they can, but there's so many women who just, we're so busy. We have so many pressures on us as women that we sometimes don't even have the space to dream, let alone actualize an inspiration that comes through. So I just feel like the future of my work is gonna be so much around just helping women just pursue their dreams.
The other thing that I see happen a lot with, I'm just gonna say women, cause I mostly work with women. I'm sure that this would translate over to men or women who are more in their masculine, but it's like, how do you lead yourself through that? Because I see often like people hire me because they want me to lead them through it, and I'm like, you know, I'm not gonna fix you. Like I'm not gonna fix these limiting beliefs for you. I'll call you out on 'em and I'll tell you how spirit's inspiring me, how you can walk through them. But really you have to take the initiative to lead yourself. So I'm obsessed with it. I'm excited for it.
What do you want? It could be career, it could be a house, it could be a feeling, it could be something, but like, what are you guys dreaming about? If you don't know, spend some time with yourself and get an idea, right? Like I actually get a ton of my inspirations in the bath. Now really kind of like pay attention to, is there an aspect of yourself that doesn't think that you could do it? I know for me, stepping into this work full time was really scary because even like late last year, I was like, how could I be sustained doing this? Like at a minimum I need nine clients a week. What if I get sick? What if I get eight? Like, does that mean I can't pay my mortgage? These are the thoughts. These are the things that were coming up in my mind that made me feel that it might not be possible. It might not be possible. And I made five figures my first month. It was insane. It was way more than I thought could have happened, but you do have to work through what your limiting beliefs are. What is holding you back from thinking that this could potentially be possible?
And then know that you might not have a solution before your spirit encourages you to make the leap. So then you kind of have to live in the realm of uncertainty. Can I live with uncertainty? Can I live with the unknown? Now, the truth of the matter is, in my spiritual practice, I had it on the side for many years before I went full-time. So I'd built up a clientele and I had a lot of evidence in my life that showed that there was a desire to work with me. So what you wanna do now, for the people who wanna do this work kind of full time, is work on building trust with your community. There are a certain amount of people who are attracted to you, and you also have to start speaking about what you're most interested in talking about.
A lot of spiritual entrepreneurs get really stuck, like, I don't know what to say. I don't know what people expect of me. I don't know what people expect to hear from me. Get rid of all of that. You literally show up with what you're most passionate about talking about, because that's going to be what expands your energy and what other people are attracted. And you'll actually find what people wanna hear most about from you through just starting to talk. So, you wanna start building trust. You wanna start building relationships with people, and people will look at you from afar for a long time. I've actually had people who have followed me and messaged me for two years before they bought a reading with me. And that's fine. So, you just keep showing up as yourself and you keep showing up, talking about things that you're so passionate about, building trust, building your reputation, and then people will start being attracted to wanna work with you because you're at this vibration. They're like, Ooh, I want, I wanna sit in that vibration. It's all energy. It's all energy. It's all energy. So just start there. Just start building trust. Just start exercising your voice and talking about things you're really passionate about and building the energy behind your practice. And start nicheing down on your messaging. And then it just kind of takes off from there.
Once you start stepping more fully into your path, more fully into your dharma, more will come to you, right? A lot of people are waiting for the more to come before they put themselves out there, but Spirit will always ask you to leap first. Always. So just do the things, guys, right? I was telling myself stories that were so contrary to the evidence of my life. It was shocking. And so I actually had to lean on the evidence of my life. The evidence is, Danielle, you've always booked out your readings, right? Like the evidence is, Danielle, you've always booked out your classes. What on earth makes you think that you couldn't do this, and that people all of a sudden wouldn't wanna work with you if you went full-time? Right?
So I had to actually lead myself through inner dialogue that was kind to get to a place that I was courageous enough to make the leap, right? So look at the evidence of your life, even creating evidence list. What is the evidence? People enjoy sessions with me. I'm not saying that for me, but I'm saying you guys, saying like, what is the evidence? People like sitting with you, right? Why would that be any different if you put yourself out there a little bit more? Follow every cookie crumb spirit gives you until it doesn't feel good anymore. I follow every inspiration. I follow it through because I don't know where it's gonna lead me, and some of them I end up letting go. I'm like, okay, well this was fine while it was here, but then I'm, I'm changing.
My business is changing every year. If you look at the history of Squamish Medium over the past seven years, every single year, my practice has looked slightly different. People like wait to launch a website I'm like, just launch because your offerings are gonna probably change every couple months. Every couple months. So just be okay changing as you go, right? And not being so pinned down to like, this is it. This is it. Fear is awesome. I literally run towards fear now. I'm like, I'm scared of this. I am running towards that because I have seen what lays on the other side of that fear, which so many people don't get to experience, and it's magic. It's complete magic. And so anything that scares me, I literally run towards it now. I understand the fear, but the more you walk through it, the more magic you're gonna have in your life. I promise you.
When I received my first grant for $20,000, I was actually crying in my shower. Yeah, it was like last year, I actually cried in my shower and I was saying to myself, and I was saying Spirit, I was like, why do people see something in me that I clearly don't see? Like these people believe in me so much that they gave me $20,000 for my dream of launching a podcast and a website and going full time in my business. They believed in me, so why am I not believing in myself to this level? And it was some inner child healing work that had to get done.
I believe in you guys. I believe in each and every single one of you, and I know if you have a dream, there is nothing that can stop you from pursuing it except for yourself.
Last year, full moon in Leo, a year ago, I had to kind of like do something really scary and stand up and share my mediumship gifts in front of a live audience. What scares you that you really wanna do in your life? I still have some things that scare me that I wanna do. Like I wanna do an online group demonstration and I get asked all the time to do them. So why does that scare me more than doing it in person? I don't know. It's just like one of those things that I really wanna go through. And I do them, like in Mavis' class. I'm in her advanced mediumship mentorship, and essentially I do one every couple weeks, for other mediums. So it's like I'm still working through a lot of my fears in my practice and I'll never lie to you guys and pretend that I have it all together and I don't. So I'm still having to walk through certain things that scare me all the time. So I wanna know what's kind of scaring you guys.
Being a leader. That scares you? Start by leading yourself, right? Leading yourself is so important. It's one of the big things that they should teach us in school, but they don't know how to teach us. Being powerful, for women, is kind of hard. And I seen how that played out for me in the corporate world because I found that the more powerful I was, the worst people felt around me. The last thing I wanna do is make other people feel shitty. So what I used to do, which is not a good habit, was make myself appear to be less powerful or less happy or less smart. I would like dim my light, right, dim my light, try to make other people feel comfortable by making myself appear to be less powerful.
But what I learned, when I finally just kind of showed up as the powerful person I feel like, like I literally feel like in my life, it actually inspired other people more than it let other people down. I might have, you know, brought up the shadow in a couple people, but when I kind of just showed up just full on powerful, it actually inspired other people to be just as powerful, which is better, in my opinion. But for years I spent tons of time trying to be so not threatening to people that I would dim my light all the time. And so that's not a good way to be either. So just know power is your essence, and so you're not living in alignment if you're not expressing your power.
This is a lonely path. It's a solo journey. Mediumship is a very solo journey. Like there's always some friends that come, but it's hard to keep friends in this industry, right? There's always comparison that comes up. We try to avoid it, but it's like hard to avoid. So any kind of like medium friends I've had, it's only lasted a little while, sadly. The spiritual journey is a solo one. It doesn't have to be though. Like if you can learn to heal some of those sister wounds and some of those wounds that, if you shine bright, I also can't shine bright, which is like one of the biggest lies that we tell ourselves. Why can't we all be special? Why can't we all be magnificent? Because we are. But there's something within the sister wound that makes us feel that if somebody else is shining brightly, we also can't shine bright, which is a lie.
So the more that we can let go of those layers and like those wounds and those stories, the more we can connect with other people with the same interests, and the more that we can connect with other people in the same path to make it a little bit less lonely. So that's why I started a community of light workers, helping heal the sister wounds, like there's no comparison. People dip into comparison, they'll reach out and we can like talk through it, right? So I love it.
We do fall out of alignment with people or you have just different interests. I remember when I first got on a spiritual path, I didn't know how to talk to my friends. I didn't know how to talk to other people because all I wanted to talk about was like the spiritual stuff. And you know, that's an inside thing. It's not like they rejected me. I'd even give them a chance to. The amygdala is like the fear based part of our brain. I just listened to Christine Haslers over and on with it. But they actually had the science of gratitude and they talked about how the negative bias. For every one positive thought, there's nine negative thoughts that the amygdala creates. So it's not surprising that so many of us are walking around with like the worst case scenario at the forefront of our minds, if we think about that.
So when you do things like gratitude practices, it actually balances out the negative and positive biases. So, If you do something like a gratitude practice, even more than affirmations, I think they said the science shows that you will go from one positive thought to nine negative ones to six negative thoughts and three positive. Like you can actually train your brain and like give the amygdala a rest when you focus on things like gratitude, right? What are you grateful for? Look at the best shit that's happening around in your life and you can start training your brain to not default into that fear.
Just by not doing the thing, you are actually living your worst case scenario, right. Like every day you're not doing the thing, you're actually living your worst case scenario already. So it can't get any worse. Just go for it. We all have very different levels of confidence based off of what's happened to us in our lives, how we've dealt with things in our lives, how we've like healed things in our lives as well. I think I was born confident in some ways, and then when I got onto the mediumship path, a lot of insecurities started coming up. I never cared about being right or wrong before, but then when you started developing mediumship, you always wanna be right. I've never had that desire to be like right and correct and like perfect. And then when I got into the mediumship path, because the stakes were so high, because broken hearts were on the line, that's where like some of my insecurities came up. So I actually had to learn how to become confident in my mediumship just through the doing. Again, you're not doing the thing because it scares you, you're actually already living your worst case scenario. So you might as well just do the thing and see what happens. Right.
Look at how you define success, like you know, is success money? Is success helping people make transformations? Is your success like working two hours a day? Is success more time with family? So really look at what you define to be successful, and then set goals that just get you towards that, right? You have to set goals, and you need to have somewhere that you're going, or else you're going to just like float around like a butterfly. Just fly fly fly fly fly. Right. So define success, set a goal, and meet that goal, whether it's a weekly, monthly, yearly. I do suggest like weekly or something so you can keep momentum kind of going.
But the only thing that will make you not successful is not even trying the thing. Right. You know, last year I had a lot of success in my practice, but I did have a few things that did not pan out. But I kept going with them and they did end up panning out over months of keeping trying. But I did have some failures last year. But there's huge learning and growth within, you know, falling a bit too sometimes. Right. There's good lessons there. Really great to have people in your inner circle that support and feel you.
I have a hard time cuz like I'm very lucky. I've always been very lucky in life. I think I was just like born lucky and I think Jupiter in my first house has something to do with that. It's like, you guys ever go to a bingo hall when somebody wins, everyone's like, ugh. That's how I feel in my life right now. Like, it's so hard to find people to celebrate things that are going well with. On my personal Facebook, I feel like it's a bingo hall. I'm like, oh my God, I've been in business a year. It's like crickets, like no posting. Tumbleweeds going by. You know, that's kinda, I have to learn to like celebrate myself and find, you know, validation within myself and my own journey. So yeah, it's hard to find people in your inner circle that will be willing to like celebrate with you and like see you. And that's what I try to offer everyone who works with me. It's like I really want people to feel celebrated and I want people to feel like super seen, cause I don't have that in my life. I never really have.
Yeah, so I'm always trying to create things that I wish I had. There was a point really early on where maybe I gave too much of my power away to some of my teachers, like too much of myself over to the teachers to validate me, you know, idolize them a little bit. And so it actually really kind of taught me to go to the inner guru a lot. Right. And then also as a teacher now, I try to make sure that I'm not creating like a cult atmosphere or being idolized in any way because I'm a super, like, fallable human being.
I don't use the word disconnected. I know some of my students here are like, Ugh. But I do feel disengaged sometimes, right? So there's sometimes where I just wanna slack. There's sometimes where I just wanna be a human in my jammies all day, and like have wine at three o'clock. There's days like that, right? Times where I don't wanna sit in the power all the time and then I don't. It's all good, right? It's all good. But yeah, there are times where I feel more disengaged than others and that's why I actually intentionally schedule breaks in my life. So I usually take off August and December typically from doing readings and serving and just go into preservation mode. So I have less of a chance of doing that. And I also stopped booking out my sessions away far in advance. At one point I was booking like a year out. I'll release sessions like when I know I feel like doing lots of sessions.
And that's the beauty of being an entrepreneur, as long as you're not a people pleasing entrepreneur, which I am not. I'm one of the most boundaried spiritual entrepreneurs you will ever meet. And I honor my boundaries every single time.
Today, I am living the life I manifested in 2018 from doing this exercise. Okay? So if you wanna grab a planner, Or even just the pen and paper, your notebook or whatnot. I'm not super consistent with my journals. So here's like a blank week. Put a date. So maybe you wanna say Spring 2022, and you write out your Dream Week.
What are you doing at 9:00 AM on a Monday in your Dream Week? What are you doing on Tuesday at three o'clock on your Dream Week? Like how many clients are you gonna see that day? Write out your Dream Week, even write out how you feel on that day in your dream week. Write it out. Get crystal clear on it.
And I didn't realize until, I can't remember how I found it, but it was like a 2018 journal was the Danielle Laporte Journal and I opened it and I said, 2019 Dream Week. And though I quit my job in 2019, I chickened out and it actually took another year to fully leave my position, I was shocked that at that moment I was living my dream week. How many clients I was seeing, but I was making four times the money, which was kind of fascinating and unexpected. I'm used to staying small. I'm used to dreaming small. That's how I've always been. But now I'm learning to kind of dream bigger. So I was even doing the Angel Hour on Mondays. On Mondays. I'm like, are you kidding me?
And we also know through like the science of manifesting, if we can call it that. I think they call it like para science research or something. But we know that manifesting is all about the feeling, right? Like do you feel like it could be a reality for you? The more you tune into that, so for every day, what are you doing on Monday? How do you feel that day? How much money you're making that day? Write out your Dream Week. Worked really well for me without me even realizing it worked. And again, if you don't have a planner, just grab a notepad. Like, this is what I'm doing Monday. This is how much I made for the week. This is how I felt.
I don't do enough of this, to be honest with you, that I thought I would do. Like I was hoping to spend more time in my week in devotional practices, like more meditating. I spend all my days alone, which I love. I really wanted solitude. It's a little bit freaky how much I like being alone. It's a problem. It's a problem. On Tuesday, I got home from dropping all the kids off, and just at that moment I'm like, I wanna go paddle boarding. I had so much to do, but I just decided to shove my paddleboard in my car and drive across the street to the lake. And I went paddle boarding for an hour and a half and I got a whole download for another class.
So that could be considered devotion, I guess, right? Because I had a desire and I followed it and I was devoted to myself in that moment. And I was devoted to my spirit. And really it's gonna be my clients that benefit from it because what I'm creating is gonna be awesome and needed in the world cause people are asking me for it.
Could I be meditating at this time? And sometimes I'll be so busy in the day doing that I'm like, oh, I'll do it tonight, but I never feel like it at night. I don't devote myself at night. The other thing that I do is I exercise every single day and I sweat. Sweat, sweat, sweat. I love exercising, but I do prioritize exercising after my last session. Could I move that to the evening? Probably. It's all just like this kind of like balance stuff you have to kind of figure out. But I did think I would do that, but then I have to try to see like you're actually devotional every day because you're continuously talking to spirit. You're continuously listening to spirit. You're continuously following the inspirations of your soul. That could be considered devotional. So maybe, and I'm just talking this out loud with you guys, but maybe I'm just being hard on myself because I thought I would be sitting in that chair for an hour a day when my devotion's out on my paddle board in nature.
There's probably things that you're doing in your life that are like, have tos that you may be able to like let go of. Even with my husband, I hate cooking. There's nothing I enjoy about being in the kitchen. I don't enjoy cutting up veggies. I kind of enjoy sauteing things, but like there's nothing I enjoy about being a homemaker. Nothing. There's nothing that lights me up about homemaker. I do love clean home. But I also don't mind hiring a cleaner for $60 a week to deep clean my home, right? And so I had to tell my husband, to make more space in my life, I said, look, I have breakfast and dinners, you do lunches. I don't wanna make another lunch box. And so I just had to ask for that help and kind of create that space. And yes, that's only 20 minutes a day in earth time but that expansiveness for me in spirit time, it freed up a lot of space, right? And so that was one thing I kinda had to do.
Again, time. Illusion, right? I don't wanna go too into it because I don't know enough about it, but time is an illusion. And if we can translate time into energy and spaciousness, it's like 3 fold, 10 fold, a hundred fold. And so though we may save an hour, in energy, it's like quantum leaps of how much it frees up for us. And so we can probably lighten our loads a little bit in all these have-tos.
And even work. I have too many dreams. I can't sit at this desk anymore. And they were like, well, what do you want? I just told you I wanna chase my dreams. And I don't wanna sit at my desk anymore. And I wanted to free up that space. And they came back to me with a four day work week and I got to work from home. I was like, what? Okay, I'll try it. We'll see what happens. So like even asking work something that you think is a non-negotiable. Like I was willing to leave and they ended up just giving me what I wanted. And I left a year later cause it turned out, it wasn't about the time, it was about the energy. You'd be surprised what you can get away with when you ask for what you need in this life. And if you need more space for your develop, I bet you that space is there.
I'm not like wounded by this in any way, but I did grow up in, you know, pretty extreme poverty. No one in my family ever graduated from high school. So, like no one was expecting me to graduate from high school. There was no expectations of me. There was no dreams for me. There was no aspirations for me. And that's no fault of anyone else, but I come from a line of people who don't dream big. And I'm the only entrepreneur in my entire family, even my extended family. I had to kind of be my own dreamer and I'm paving a path for my children that was not laid down in front of me. So I did spend my entire life being very small and not having aspirations. I remember even thinking, at 14, my parents were like, what do you wanna do when you grow up? And I remember sitting in the room saying, I guess I'll work in an office like my mom. And that was my dream, and I manifested that for myself. I didn't know how to dream big, but it comes.
To be honest with you, it was a painful transition for me because I got poked fun of a lot, even by my family. And nothing wrong with them. I'm not poo-pooing on 'em. They're lovely, all of 'em. I love every single person in my family and they have not held me back in any way, shape or form. My parents never said there was nothing I couldn't do, but they never also said you could do anything. It's kind of like that energy. But like I remember telling my dad, this is so hard. And I texted my parents that a hundred thousand podcast post a week before because I actually didn't post it until I had 111,000 downloads and I sent it to my parents. I was like, can you believe this? And my dad wrote back one thing. He said, how humble of you. How do you think I felt in that moment? If you're like sharing a success, sharing something that you worked real hard for and showed incredible tenacity about. Two and a half years of constant podcast recording and showing up and serving, to get that kind of response from your family, crushed.
That's my whole life. Any time I would be proud of myself for something or excel in something, I would get knocked down energetically by the people around me, including my husband. I tell my husband, I'm like, oh my God, I had a $30,000 month. He's like, yeah, but how much do you actually get to keep? That was like, that's the immediate response. So I'm surrounded by that in my life still to this day. That conversation with my dad was like less than a month ago. I've been trying to rise above that. And so that's how come I'm so passionate about leading myself through that, right. Melanie Ann Layer, she's somebody who, I'm in her world and that's like, she's like, I stand for the one who leads herself. That's like me. How do I deal with it? I lead myself. I validate myself. I don't need their validation. If they get it to me, it's bonus. It's extra on top. I'm proud of me. I know who I am and I know who I am from the inside out. Because of experiences like that, I had to find out who I was. And that's who I carry around. I know who I am.
And so yeah, it hurts. And I have that human reaction and I'm like, ugh. Like I don't question myself. I don't say, which I used to do. I used to be like, oh, maybe I'm an egomaniac and maybe I like myself too much. And I used to do that and question that and follow the energetic trail that they were leading for me. But in the end, I'm like, you guys have no idea. You have no idea what it feels like to be me day in day. And that's the sad part, is that I know the expansiveness that I feel that it almost feels like you can't even contain it in your body.
I realize that not everyone in the world gets to feel like that. And that's sad. And that's how come I'm passionate about my mentorship work because it's like, I want people to feel like this. I want people to feel like this. And it starts with, who are you? And I had to go into a deep meditation, a meditation practice, where I just entered the space saying, who am I? Who am I really? I was really trying to discover who I was. I'm a spirit. I am spirit embodied in this human experience. I am magnificent. I am expansive. I am bright as fuck. I'm magical and that's who I am. And I get to be that person in every minute. And if people can't keep up, I know that they wish they had a little bit of my life, or a little bit of my courage, or a little bit of my self love, and they never got to receive it. And I know that when they go home and they kind of review, They'll be like, oh, shouldn't have done that.
But I lead myself. I would say on a personal power scale, I'm at about 60%. This is what Danielle looks like at about 60% personal power. There's still times I kick myself because I'm like, I'm really only feeling good if I'm validated in some things of my life. And so I get to see like, okay, there's still some more personal power growth to be done in this instance. So we're always growing and evolving, but when it comes to family and the people around me, I've even had to tell my husband, I'm like, look, you can hop on and keep up, or it will work, right? Because this is me and this is the path. And he has learned over the 14 years together and the eight years I've been on this self-development journey and this mediumship development journey that the way I live is pretty cool, and it benefits us all. So he's like, you just keep going. I'll catch up. He actually watches Gaia with me now and stuff.
So it's all about personal power. The ego is not the enemy. It's not something to be combated or overtaken or defeated in any way. It's like, how do we learn to live harmoniously with this dual side of ourselves? Well, the ego does not serve me in my mediumship work, but it does serve me in my business, and it does serve me in chasing my dreams. And it does serve me in like, I can do this. And so it does kind of like serve me. Again, it's personal power. It's not looking outside of ourself for validation. See, when we talk to our families about it, it's because we also want them to believe us because we're also still trying to get to that place of really believing ourselves and really believing us, right? And so a little bit of external validation doesn't hurt. And with family it's always like a little bit harder.
And so, but I still share. See my dad's like a big meditator and a very spiritual person, and he does not believe you should be charging for readings. He does not believe I should be making like the money I do off my spiritual work, which I don't. Like you know, a lot of what I get is like from my membership and my classes, my programs, which is like serving people. But it's like, you know, there's that kind of spiritual guilt that's still there, which I've healed from. It has taking me a long time to heal from that. So it is a tricky trap.
And the funny thing is, about mediumship, is you do need external validation. You do need a yes from your client. You need that they understand. So even in mediumship, it's like this really fine balance between, a yes and the no needs to feel the same for you inside. Right? And to get to that kind of like equilibrium place where the yes and the no influence you, the same, that's a tricky place to get to. I'm there now, but I will say I haven't been there my whole career. And I know that mediums will either feel like super high with the yes, super low with the no, but you gotta get to this place of neutrality that the yeses no have to feel the same. It's a funny trap to be in because at the beginning of your mediumship development journey, you need the external validation that you're not crazy. You just can't stay there is all.
Every time I walk through like a little bit of fear, I get a little bit more courage. And all those little things add up over time. And this is where I am now. The best way to overcome any wounds around your family is accept them fully. And accept yourself. Accept any roles that you've played in the dynamics. It's all about acceptance. Now, my family helps me out a lot. Like if I ask my dad, can you go pick up my son today cuz x y z, he will never say no. He'll be like, yes, a hundred percent. What do you need? And they, that's the way my parents are. They're so, so helpful. There's just like these other aspects of them. This like desire for support, this desire to be told like, I'm proud of you, which like I've never heard, right? That's kind of where I have to accept that they may never hold that role in my life. So, I have to be that for myself. So that's how I do it. I just fully accept them, how they come. I don't wish that they were any other way. And that acceptance and forgiveness is just how I find my inner peace, because I'm worthy of it.
The personal power comes from feeling the fear and doing it anyways, doing things I don't really wanna do because I'm scared. Understanding that that fear is actually because it's like meant for me, because I care. It's like every time I do things like that, I find my personal power. I've had clients that can incredibly trigger me and like knock me down to the point I wanted to like hide under a rock, but continuing to like show up anyways despite that, like facing those kind of things. So the trigger of it dissipates so it doesn't impact me anymore. Those are all little things. Like personal power is not gonna come from one instance. It's gonna come from a series of instances and they're gonna compound. I flow naturally with the masculine and feminine energies. And my masculine drive when I'm in drive mode, creation mode, doing the things, ride that wave. And when I'm in my ebb and I'm in my feminine and I'm recluding, I ride that wave. So in my spiritual business, I ride the waves and I never force anything.